harunire
by pengiechan
Summary: She'd forgotten to think of him as her brother. KousukexRyouko, manga based. Oneshot.


Every now and again, I come across a piece of music that demands it be used as the basis for something I write. It doesn't always work out, but sometimes the call is so strong that I'm forced to write until I've completely exhausted the idea and listened to the song so much I don't think I can ever play it again. Quinka,with a Yawn's "harunire" was one such song. From the very first time I heard it, it was meant to be the basis for this piece; the singer's "anata wo shiawase ni shitai" became Kousuke's corresponding line instantly, and everything else fell into place. I would highly recommend listening to the song while reading this, for effect, and there is a link to grab the mp3 in my profile if you so desire.

All in all, it took me about a year to write this in its entirety - not because it was difficult, but because I wanted it to be _right_. That and I'm slow. Either way, I hope you enjoy.

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><p><strong>harunire<br>**

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><p>She'd forgotten to think of him as her brother.<p>

After their time in the hospital, they'd gone back to living together, just as they had before. But things were different. She'd become more easygoing, and he'd lost that serious expression that had seemed to haunt his face. Surely, things were not over yet, but they were better prepared to face the future, now.

It was a future that they would spend together.

They walked home together from their Tsukiomi graduation, leaving Rio behind at an ice cream parlor with Eyes. It was a damp day, slightly chilly, and the first signs of spring were just beginning to creep into the trees. Kousuke was quiet and Ryouko didn't have much to talk about, either. The only thing on her mind was the way Kousuke had hugged her, just a few minutes before. When the ceremony was completed, he'd found her in the crowd and scooped her up into his arms, laughing into her ear as he held her tight. He had been happy, of course - neither of them had expected to make it this far, to finish high school - but she hadn't anticipated that kind of reaction. Rio and Eyes had found them, then, and the moment had ended, but...

Things had fallen into place, just like that. They'd never spoken the words, never so much as acknowledged it, but they were together. And the way he'd lifted her into her arms and spun around had been wonderful, a moment of true happiness for both of them. Something about that moment had felt so _right_, as if it was meant to be that way after all -

"Ryouko?"

"... a - ah. Sorry." His voice snapped her back to the current time and place, and she looked up, smiling the best she could. "I was just thinking about something."

"It's not like you to be so quiet. I thought you'd be talking about your plans for university." His green eyes searched hers for a moment, and then he shrugged, tossing the jacket of his uniform over one shoulder. "I think Narumi-otouto was right. I'll join you there."

"I thought you would say that..."

"I have to put my mind to use somehow. Besides..." He grinned, looking over his shoulder at the school in the distance, then up at the gray sky. "I'd hate to live through all this, beat the curse, and then not be able to get a job because I didn't bother with university. Although it doesn't seem to matter for Rio that she didn't finish high school... or Rutherford..."

"Ah..."

"Speaking of Rutherford, he said he'd pay for our tuition. That's a lot less to worry about. But I should probably get a part-time job this summer anyway, right? He has a lot of money, but it wouldn't be fair to ask him to pay for everything, especially if he's already helping out with the upkeep of your aunt's house."

"Mm."

"Hey. You really are quiet." He peered down at her. "Having second thoughts?"

"No," she replied, and avoided his gaze. "I'm still thinking."

"About what?"

She bit down on her bottom lip, hesitating. "It's nothing."

"It's not nothing, Ryouko. Come on. If I said something stupid again - "

"No. It isn't that." She stared down at her feet on the sidewalk as they turned the corner, beginning to proceed down the road that would lead to her house. "I wasn't sure if you were planning to... stay with me."

"Where else would I go?" His face was out of sight at the moment, but Ryouko was sure he was looking at her incredulously. "Living with Rutherford isn't a walk in the park, you know, especially with that Watcher hanging around all the time. And Rio's going back to the Middle East in a few days - "

"That's not..." She sighed, feeling uncomfortable. "It's just that I'm not sure what to tell my aunt... if she ever comes back to Japan..."

Kousuke groaned. "She doesn't know I've been living with you?"

"No. I didn't tell her." She shook her head. "She's been in Shanghai on business for an extended period of time, so there was no chance she would even be back to visit, but... because I've graduated, now... she'll probably feel some sort of obligation to check on me..."

"That's easy enough. Just tell her I'm your roommate."

"Kousuke." She lifted her head, finally, looking up into his eyes. "She isn't going to believe that. And she didn't give me permission to have a roommate."

He shrugged. "Well, surely she knows a little about the Blade Children, right?"

"Right... Since it was her sister who..." Ryouko let her sentence end unfinished, not needing to approach the subject any more than she already had. "... but what does that have to do with this?"

"Easy enough." He shrugged again. "If you need to, you can tell her I'm your brother."

"Idiot, you _aren't_ my brother - "

They both stopped walking at the same moment. Ryouko snapped her head away, staring hard at something in the distance, wishing desperately to take back the words that had just slipped out of her mouth. It was the first time she'd said such a thing, the first time she'd let that thought, that idea, be known to him. It was only because she'd just been thinking about it; at any other time she would have said _yes, of course, I'll tell her that_ and they would have gone on as they had before. But now...

"Hey." Kousuke's voice was soft. "It seems like something must have changed... for you to say that, right?"

Her face burned. "I didn't mean it like - what I mean is - "

"Come this way." She looked up and he was suddenly walking away from her, off the sidewalk and towards a park they were passing at the moment. "There's a shortcut to your house through here."

"We're already close enough - "

"Come on."

Kousuke gave her no time to object: he broke into a run, dropping the jacket of his uniform onto the grass. Ryouko scowled, but the idea that anyone expected to outrun her was preposterous enough to force her to act. She paused for a moment to stretch her legs, then started after him, scooping up the discarded piece of his uniform before bolting full speed into the park. As fast as he could move, she was always faster, and it took only a few seconds to close the distance between them. When she was by his side, he nodded once in the direction of a more heavily wooded area. "Through there," he yelled, and that was all the direction she needed. She picked up her pace and ran past him, down a hill and into the trees, ignoring his shouts of protest behind her. She was halfway through the trees before she slowed and stopped, breathing deeply, leaning back against a large, weathered elm tree. It wouldn't have been fair to leave him completely behind, after all.

Two full minutes passed before he came into view, jogging slowly towards her. "Geez, Ryouko," he shouted, and sounded winded, "you could have waited!"

"You were the one who started running," she replied, and when he was close, threw the uniform jacket to the ground. "You forgot this. It isn't nice to litter."

"Yeah..." He finally reached her, breathing hard as he came to a stop in front of the tree she'd chosen. "Sorry. It's not like I need it anymore."

"Fine. I'm cold, anyway." She leaned over and picked up the piece of clothing, brushing it off before sliding it around her shoulders. She was fighting hard to act calm, unmoved by their sudden run and the words they'd spoken before, but her heart was beginning to pound hard in her chest. "Why did we come this way?"

"Ah, well..." He sighed. "It's not really a shortcut, but..."

"I know that. I'm not stupid." She pulled the coat tight around her frame, looking away. "You have something you want to say, right?"

"Er... well..."

She scoffed. "Kousuke. Spit it out - "

"When did it change?"

"When..." She hesitated, not sure if she'd heard him correctly. "When did... _what_ change?"

"As long as we've been together, you've always called me your brother. Even when you knew I hated it, you called me that. Even when you knew it was painful for me to only be able to think of you as a sister, you called me that." The redhead's voice trembled, but he still spoke calmly, resolutely. "By now you have to know how I felt - how I still feel about you, Ryouko, but I made myself stop..." He paused for a moment, clearing his throat. "I made myself stop wanting."

Ryouko lowered her head, drawing in a deep breath of the chilled spring air. "Why?" she asked, quietly, unable to think of anything else to ask, to say, at that moment. She couldn't claim to find these words and thoughts unexpected, but to hear them...

"The most important thing was that I stayed with you." She heard him move closer, his shoes snapping small twigs that had fallen to the floor of the wooded area. "Nothing else mattered. I wanted to be by your side, like I've always promised, and if it meant pretending those feelings didn't exist..." He laughed, the sound sudden and unexpected. "Well, I've been doing that for a long time, I guess."

Her cheeks burned suddenly. "Ah..."

"So..." He cleared his throat again. "Because I thought you would always call me your brother, I made myself forget about the idea of anything else... But if you can say something like "you aren't my brother," then... something has changed, hasn't it? Even if it's just a little bit..."

"It's..." Ryouko pressed her lips together, feeling a fluttering somewhere deep in her chest. "It's your fault."

"Eh?"

"It's your fault," she repeated, and finally lifted her eyes to his. "Because you've been..." She stumbled over the rest of her sentence, feeling her face burn with embarrassment. "You've been with me so long, and even when you're doing something reckless, I want to be with you, and - it's too much for me to explain - " She closed her eyes, pulling his jacket tighter around her, breathing in his scent. "I didn't want this to happen, but now that... I... feel like this..."

There was silence between them and around them, a breeze blowing softly through the trees, stirring the leaves on the elm just slightly. Ryouko stood still, eyes shut tight, her heart beating a steady rhythm in her chest. She stood and waited, unsure of what to expect from him next. Would he turn and run away? Or would he understand what she said, what she was feeling? It was true that she'd known, to some extent, what he felt, but _he_ couldn't have known that she was beginning to return those feelings, beginning to want the same things as him. Not even she'd realized it, until that morning, until he'd swept her up into his arms and held her tight, laughing into her ear -

"What do you want, Ryouko?" His voice was soft, but still loud enough to hear, and suddenly she realized he was standing right in front of her, close enough to touch. "If you want to go back to what we had before, I won't hold a grudge. But if there is any chance that we can be something more..."

She looked up, opening her eyes. "Kousuke - "

"It doesn't matter to me. As long as I can be by your side, that's enough. What I really want is to make you happy." He turned his gaze upwards, looking through the branches of the trees. "That's all."

She stood silently for a moment, then leaned heavily back against the trunk of the elm, closing her eyes again. "You do."

"I mean - "

"I know what you mean." She bowed her head. "I want us to stay with you. I want to have a future with you. Not as Blade Children, or as... siblings, but as... this. Even if we only manage a little bit longer... thinking of that makes me happy."

The silence was uncomfortable for a moment, and Ryouko could only measure the distance between them in breaths. Suddenly she felt his hands press down on her shoulders, and he leaned down to her, aligning his lips with her own. A shock ran through her body, but she stood still, feeling him kiss her softly. At first she was unsure, conflicted... but this was a sweet feeling, one that she'd wanted for longer than she realized. Even if she'd once thought of him as a sibling, thought that things like this would be impossible...

He drew back and she opened her eyes wide, looking up at him with her lips parted, realizing all at once that she'd been holding her breath. "K - Kousuke," she stammered, her voice weak, "I - "

"I wanted to do that for a long time," he murmured, his hands dropping from her shoulders, and she noticed that his face had turned pink. "I know it wasn't a good thing..."

"Idiot," she snapped, completely without thinking, and reached up to punch him in the chest. "Don't assume something like that."

"But - "

"If I didn't - " She felt warmth flood into her face suddenly, and she turned her gaze from his as she drew back her hand, folding her arms. "... if I didn't want it, I would have stopped you. I would have said I didn't."

"... Ryouko."

"I said I wouldn't call you my brother anymore, after all." She sighed heavily. "So things like this are okay..."

"A - ah..."

"B - but don't get carried away!" Her cheeks burned, and she folded her arms tighter beneath his jacket. "Every now and then is okay, but don't get any ideas about kissing me all the time, especially not in front of Rio or Rutherford, because they'll just make a big fuss about it, and - "

"Ryouko. I won't." He laughed, but the sound was shaky, as if he was still nervous. "I just wanted to... do that. Even if it was the only time I could. After this day, it was all I could think about..." He paused. "Actually... I guess I've been thinking about it for a while..."

The brunette's cheeks burned red hot. "Idiot."

"I guess." He laughed, and suddenly he was close again, his arms winding carefully around her waist and pulling her into an embrace. She could do nothing but lean into him, feeling a flutter in her chest again, and the warmth of his body as it pressed against her own. It felt nice - she couldn't remember the last time she'd been hugged, before that day - and she thought for a moment that she could get used to the feeling of being held. As if reading her mind, Kousuke spoke softly into her ear: "I'm going to have trouble staying away from this, though..."

"Mm." She leaned up to rest her chin on the top of his shoulder, her cheek softly brushing against his own. "This isn't so bad."

"R - really?"

"Yes. You're warm." She exhaled deeply. "And it's cold right now. We should go home."

She could feel him smile, his arms tightening around her for just a moment longer before dropping. He stepped back, reaching up to adjust the glasses on his nose, which she guessed had been bumped slightly out of place by their kiss. "Home, eh... can I really call it that, now?"

"For the time being." Ryouko's good humor was returning, and she grinned up at him before starting to walk away from the elm tree, pulling his uniform jacket from around her shoulders and tossing it blindly in his direction. "But if you do anything stupid, I'll still kick you out."

"Oi, Ryouko - !" He scrambled to follow her, a whine creeping into his voice. "What are you going to tell your aunt?"

She shrugged. "I'll figure it out. As long as you're with me, that's what matters."

Kousuke looked for a moment as if he would say something, his mouth half-open, but something in her words convinced him otherwise. He smiled again, sliding his hands into the pockets of his pants, and continued to walk with her as they made their way through the rest of the trees, back into the park, and into a grassy clearing where the sun was just beginning to shine. They stood there for some time, looking up at the sun as it crept through the clouds and gray sky, and at that moment Ryouko knew it had been meant to be like this all along.


End file.
